Marcus Aurelius source guide · Matters of Judgment
When You Miss Someone · A Matter Before Marcus
Open this as a leaf in the Emperor’s Notebook, not as a detached definition. Let affection remain present while examining absence, possession, memory, and the act of care available today. The purpose is to notice the judgment being made, consult the named record, and decide what conduct can still be commanded.
On this page you will get a clear explanation, a way to examine the idea, exact evidence from public-domain Stoic texts, and links for continuing the study.
The matter: a matter brought before the notebook
When You Miss Someone belongs here because it changes how a person names the event before acting. Begin with the bare occurrence, then write the prediction, demand, fear, or appetite laid over it.
This is a correction addressed to oneself. It does not require passivity, emotional numbness, or certainty about the outcome; it asks for an exact account of the choice still available.
Convene the ancient record
The evidence attached to this leaf comes from Epictetus, and Cicero. Its working locators are Epictetus, Discourses 2.22, Cicero, Tusculan Disputations 3.29, and Cicero, Tusculan Disputations 4.8. The voices remain attributed so that Marcus never silently absorbs another author.
Read the preserved wording before the interpretation. Ask what distinction the passage actually makes, what it leaves unresolved, and whether your first impression has claimed more than the source warrants.
Sources: Epictetus, Discourses 2.22; Cicero, Tusculan Disputations 3.29; Cicero, Tusculan Disputations 4.8
Enter what remains under command
Enter Love Without Possession when the distinction must become conduct: Allow the natural grief without adding a verdict against reality.
Write the next action narrowly enough to perform: what you will say, refuse, prepare, repair, or leave alone. Fortune includes another person’s reply, reputation, delay, and the final result.
Sources: Epictetus, Discourses 2.22
Return without awarding a verdict
After the event, compare the vow with the action. Record what was learned about when you miss someone without converting one outcome into a score for character.
A clean return names what happened, what belonged to choice, what did not, and the one rehearsal worth carrying into the next day.
What the primary texts say
These excerpts keep their work and exact locator so you can check the claim in context rather than accepting a detached quotation.
“Whoever then understands what is good, can also know how to love: but he who cannot distinguish good from bad, and things which are neither good nor bad from both, how can he possess the power of loving?”
“Show me the man so well by wisdom taught That what he charges to another's fault, When like affliction doth himself betide, True to his own wise counsel will abide.”
“Enviousness (invidentia), they say, is a grief arising from the prosperous circumstances of another, which are in no degree injurious to the person who envies”
Frequently asked questions
How should I use this notebook leaf on When You Miss Someone?
Bring one real event, separate it from the first impression, inspect the cited ancient record, and choose one action that remains yours. The leaf is a method for examination, not a promise to control the outcome.
Sources: Epictetus, Discourses 2.22; Cicero, Tusculan Disputations 3.29
Does this present Epictetus, and Cicero as Marcus Aurelius?
No. Marcus is the permanent centre of the product, while every other ancient author remains explicitly named as a source in the wider Stoic record.
Continue with Marcus Aurelius
Bring one of these source-grounded questions into the app:
- What first impression am I treating as a fact in this matter?
- What remains under command here?
- Which cited passage should I read before I act?